Business Leaders agree that effective networking skills are crucial for business development on many levels; lead generation, building referral relationships, job seeking, etc. Today’s slow economy has flooded networking meetings with business professionals needing to generate more business, re-connect or find a new job.

A large percentage of these people have had little or no networking skills training and will freely say they’re “not good” at networking. In these tight economic times, effective networking skills can determine a small business’s success.

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• An intelligent, strategic approach to networking.
• How to replace “selling” with a relaxed, focused conversation specifically designed to pre-qualify new contacts for business relationships.
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• Templates for conducting productive 1-on-1 meetings & conversations.
• Valuable follow-up relationship-building skills that will last a lifetime.

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There have been many books on Networking.
They all make a very good case for the power of connecting with others, but there is none that so effectively spells out the best strategies and tactics to use. Face-to-Face Networking Skills In A Social Media World by Mindy Selinger, guides you step-by-step to find and connect with the people you need to meet…at Networking Events, and anywhere else you may have an opportunity to engage another.

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Our world is not lacking in opportunities to initially meet & connect. Social media now brings people in every corner of the world together with the click of a mouse. Our networking reach is unlimited. Does this in itself make us better networkers? It does not matter how we connect; it’s the quality of your “First Contact” skills, that sets the stage. The age-old adage that says, “You only get one chance to make a good first impression” is so relevant to the networking exchange, both in person and online. An initial blunder can be costly.

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Would you walk up to a total stranger at a networking event and….with no prior introduction whatsoever…say to them, “I would like to add you to my professional network”?
Of course, not. Yet people do that online every day. Is that the best way to start a relationship? Why would they want to accept?

Social Media makes it easy to quickly connect with a high volume of people around the world. Racking up huge numbers of Connections, “Friends” and Followers is a point of pride for many people. But guess what; Networking is not a competitive sport.

Build your online network as strategically and thoughtfully as you do your local network. Use the same “let’s help each other develop business” approach outlined here. At the very least, write a personal note indicating that you read their profile and why you were intrigued enough to reach out.

Quality Trumps Quantity

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The above is an excerpt from my new book Face-to-Face Networking Skills in a Social Media World. In the book I didn’t say what I REALLY wanted to on this subject; Which is a bit of a rant. You have been warned. Here’s My Two Cents:

Last year, in response to the high volume of impersonal default invitations I was receiving, I put this note as the first line of my LinkedIn Profile:

“***Note:*** I welcome your invitation but *Please* read “Contact Settings” at the bottom before extending an invitation…Thank you!’

If they take the time to follow through they will find this:

“I welcome new contacts & new invitations BUT if we do not currently have a working relationship, I will not respond to the generic “I want to add you to my network” default invitation. Please tell me why you believe a connection would serve us both. Can we be of mutual support and “help each other develop some business”? That philosophy is at the *core* of my trainings. No relationship begins by getting…it begins by giving. I will start…tell me how I can assist you in your networking endeavors and I will help in whatever way I can.”

Call me old fashioned, but is it too much to expect people to… at least, read my profile before inviting me to connect?

10/02/10 – Authors note: It has been 10 months since I put that notice on my LinkedIn Profile. I have received over 50 default invitations from people who didn’t bother to read the first line of my profile, or chose to ignore it who sent me the invitation “I’d like to add you to my professional network”. I do not reply.

Speed networking is gaining in popularity and it works like this: half of the participants are seated for the entire event and the other half move from seat to seat at regular intervals. Each participant has a couple of minutes to “pitch” to the other before moving on. Some organizations use a software program that helps sort out participants and perhaps limit the more popular industries. You don’t want to sit down in front of 5 Realtors or financial Advisors.

For people who REALLY are uncomfortable with starting conversations with strangers and awkward beginnings & endings of an encounter, this is a perfect format. A bell rings and you move on…nobody gets their feelings hurt.

As with all networking events…No matter what industry you are in, the odds are that there will be very few people there actively looking for the solution you provide with your product or service. Whether or not you believe they “need” your solution is another issue. I am always dismayed when I encounter someone trying to convince another, at a networking event, that they are in need of whatever product or service they are selling. No one likes to be on the receiving end of an unwanted sales pitch. Here are some guidelines when attending a speed-networking event:
When they are pitching and you are listening:

•  
  • Ask relevant questions about their business. Who is their best type of client? Who is their best referral partner? What type of connections do they need to further their business? Take notes on the back of their card and get back to them with any connections you can make. When you connect them with someone who can be of value to them, you will have a business friend for life (if they are smart!).
  • Ask if they are on LinkedIn, Facebook or Twitter. If you feel the chemistry is right, offer to connect online and make introductions
  • Carry a small notebook for when you need more room than the back of a card
  • When you are pitching: (When possible, I let the other person go first. The more I know about them, the better I can tailor what I say so that it is relevant to them)
  • The most important point to get across is the solution you offer and who you offer it to. Minor details do not matter – not how long you have been in business, not your dedication to customer service or your location.
  • Tell them your best type of client, your best referral partner and who you need to meet to further your business. For example:
    • Do you want speaking engagements? Ask if they know groups who have speakers
    • Do you need help with learning how to use Social Media? ASK THEM FOR RESOURCES
    • LOOKING FOR A VENDOR OF SOME SORT…GRAPHIC DESIGNER OR SOMEONE TO HELP YOU TAPE AN AUIDO – ASK
  • Have something of value to give them. It doesn’t even have to be related to your industry; as long as it is something they can use to increase their business. I have free resources on my TheLinkSystem.com and SanDiegoNetworkingGuide.com websites – articles on networking skills, networking event calendars, and lots of contacts to hook them up with.
  • I will also tell people about HARO help a reporter.com I’ve talked about that service a lot
  • DO NOT add them to your mailing list without their explicit permission. I am very careful to get permission to send something to them. I tell them the name of the publication and when they can expect it.
  • Be polite if you come across your third Realtor or Financial advisor. Depend upon the

Preparation is the key…know exactly who you need to meet, the information that you need to build your business, then ask for those contacts. Being vague, general, or trying too hard to sell your services to everyone one you talk to, will not produce the results you want. Offering to help others find the contacts they need will be an approach that will get their attention. You will be the only one asking these questions…AND the only one who did not try to sell to them in two minutes or less!

But recently I came into possession of high-end charity art gallery tickets and asked a girlfriend to join me on a Friday night.  The keywords here are “charity”, “art gallery” and “Friday night”.

The first hint that told me I was in trouble was this: NO NAME TAGS.  OMG…what now? How do you start a conversation when you have no clue as to their name or where they work ? I was totally in the dark. I started to panic. Think, think.  ”Have you seen this artist’s work before?” (Who is the artist?).

Then, just when I’m chatting with some guy, his date appeared and gave me a chilling “GET AWAY FROM MY MAN!” look that sent me scurrying across the room to a familiar face I knew from a local chamber.  Being shot down (with just a look) by a jealous partner has NEVER happened at a business event in the 20+ years I’ve been attending them.

I talk about creating a large Networking Footprint in your community…having a presence in many different sectors. The social, philantropic arena (what I have heard callously called “the disease curcuit” MDA, Cystic Fibrosis, Heart Association, MS, etc.) can play an important part in making business connections, but your first priority is to support the cause at hand;  business takes a backseat. But that does not mean that you leave your business cards at home…just your name tag.

After my presentation (I was their speaker for the event), she volunteered that she positioned the tag so that it was “close to her heart.” Whatever. All I can say is that men have told me that provocatively placed name tags were awkward for them.

If you see a name tag that is a good candidate for this article, snap a picture with your phone (so handy now!), and send it in (mjs@MindySelinger.com) Enjoy!

<== This is to show you that MEN can also show questionable judgment in nametag placement. Sure, this guy is 6′11″ so his beltline is a bit higher than the average, but what was he thinking?

==> She has a great smile, but is it enough to raise his eyes up from her chest?